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Fic: this hope inside my hands

Title: this hope inside my hands
Author: K Marie (roguewords)
Rating: PG (just to be safe)
Pairing: Jack/Ianto
Disclaimer: Torchwood belongs to those not me.
Summary: If I could hold this hope inside my hands/You'd understand they let us down.
Spoilers: for Exit Wounds.
Author's Note: So much thanks to meredevachon for the beta. Title and summary belong to Fightstar. Written for Dead Letters Variations. Thanks to seperis for that challenge.

To: harkness@torchwood3.org
From: jonesi@torchwood3.org
Subject: Us.


I've set this up to show up after someone (probably Abby, she seems like she'll stick around.) enters the information of my death.

Thank you for everything. Especially not firing me after The Incident.

If I had known it would end this way, I probably wouldn't have changed a thing. Well, one thing. I wouldn't be dead and you wouldn't be alone. It seems easy enough to say, but we both know that it had to happen eventually. God Jack, after losing Owen and Tosh, it seemed like the world should have just ended there. It made sense for Gwen to leave, even if it hurt you more than you'll ever admit. She had Rhys, and later their children to look after. The job was too much—always the risk of death, dismemberment or simply disappearing. Let her know, she'd want to be there for you, even all these years later. Her current contact information is in the former employees file. And thank you for not ret-conning her. We both needed to have someone outside of Torchwood to talk to.

So we rebuilt Torchwood together, just like you had done before. I will still never agree that asking Captain Hart to help us was a good idea. Even if it was. There, you win. John was helpful and we needed him. Considering your five year absence, he was indispensable. You could have called, just once. But no, He needed you and you left. Ianto Jones, still bitter all these years later.

But you came back, and we had good times. New team, Martha dropping in on occasion, even Him, stopping in to help on a case or two.

Let Abby know where to find all of my hidden files, the ones that will let her step into my role more efficiently. I've shown her the ropes over the year or two she's been with us, but the really gritty things I've done alone, like always. She'll need that information. You may need to help her out the first few times, but she catches on quick.

Don't be alone for too long. I love you, Jack. You were the best thing to ever happen to me, and the worst.

--Ianto Jones


Jun. 4th, 2008 02:23 am (UTC)
Thank you. I don't think Ianto ever would sugarcoat, especially with Jack. It just wouldn't fit in with how he handles the world.